AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cupof boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will bealmost instantly removed.
2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by gettingsomeone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with the little woman about lifting the toilet seatby simply using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Rememberto use a timer.
5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent youfrom rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snoozebutton.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose oflaxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you willforget about the toothache.

Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move andshould, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the ducttape.